Computers are being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages and give your own opinion.

Due to the prevalence of fast
food
and unhealthy lifestyles, an increasing number of
children
have
obesity
and
health
problems. I agree that the
government
should be responsible for these issues, but I
also
think parents have to guide their
children
to live a healthy lifestyle. The
government
should take the main responsibility for
children’s
obesity
issues because it can design a policy to regulate how
food
companies how
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
cook
children’s
meals. It is all well known that high calories in junk
food
and soft drinks always lead to
obesity
and
health
issues, especially for
children
. So it is extremely important for the
government
to regulate the types of
food
categories in
children
's meals.
For example
,
instead
of fried chicken and cokes, many popular fast
food
companies
such
as KFC and McDonald's should be required to add fresh fruits and milk to their happy meal. On the other side, the issue of childhood
obesity
is not merely due to the lack of regulation of some
food
companies. Parents’ influence
also
plays a vital role in
children’s
diet and
health
conditions.
For example
, if parents always cook unhealthy
food
for [
their
Replace the word
they're
they are
show examples
]
children
and never encourage them to exercise regularly, it is impossible for
children
to have a healthy diet and keep fit.
Conversely
,
children
will live healthy, if they stay in a family with fresh
food
and exercise customs. To summarize, the
government
should take the responsibility for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children’s
obesity
and
health
problem, because it can regulate the
food
industry to cook healthy
food
for
children
.
However
, parents should
also
take measurements to guide their
children
to live healthily.
Submitted by hehuan1206 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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