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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people believe that nature plays a more significant impact on human adult intelligence, while others claim that an individual can train himself to become high-intelligent. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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It is often held that nature has a greater influence on mature human intelligence. While some people argue that mental capacity is a malleable, adaptable skill that can be developed over time, others believe that a person may train himself to be very intelligent.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 essay will analyze both viewpoints and argue in favour of the latter. On the one hand, genetics, which is influenced by nature, is one of the most significant factors impacting human intelligence. Genes associated with intellectual skills are inherited, according to research. Important cognitive aspects that have been identified in the study of the human brain suggest that they were embedded in a person even before his birth.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, many children share their parents' intellectual abilities.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, individuals may improve their overall powers of reasoning by adopting lifestyle choices that support and protect
Add an article
the brain

The noun phrase brain seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains

It seems that brain may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. In many cases, an individual who worked hard and actually tried always succeeded in their endeavours.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 implies that people can establish a high intelligence by adopting new habits.
Foe
Correct your spelling
For

The word Foe doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 example, solving logical problems can help build critical thinking skills. In my opinion,
brainpower
Correct article usage
the brainpower

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 skills of
person
Add an article
a person

The noun phrase person seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 depend on his lifestyle and habits.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, anyone can develop new abilities by training themselves. In conclusion, varied people have different levels of ability in various occupations.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I believe that society can get maximal achievements and,
as a result
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, improve IQ with consistent patience and effort.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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