At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

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Nowadays, some nations have a large percentage of early adult people, in comparison to the volume of the elderly inhabitants. From my point of view,

although

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numerous inhabitants can be beneficial to a country, having an unexperienced large working sector would harm is society due to the lack of knowledge. On the one hand,

for example

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, Spain has a jubilation system that

secure

Change the verb form

secures

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the life of a working person after they surpass a fixed jubilation age, being paid by the nation after their working life.

Therefore

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, having a low percentage of elderly people reduce the quantity of money that the government has to pay.

Thus

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, the economy can be progressively developed, without a massive payment to do in exchange

Change preposition

for

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the non-productive portion of the population.

Additionally

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aged

Correct article usage

the aged

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population have more medical issues, adding more costs to the current problem.

On the other hand

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, in Spain,

for instance

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, joining ot a decent company is hardly impossible for an

Correct your spelling

inexperienced

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unexperienced

Correct your spelling

inexperienced

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worker. Due to the obvious information needed to develop some jobs, generally specialised jobs. With

this

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, even with a young population, a majority of businesses would be reticent to admit a

first

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-time worker.

Consequently

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, the economic structure of the country would be in imminent danger, and,

in addition

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, the lack of seniors

decrease

Correct subject-verb agreement

decreases

show examples

the possible learning process to develop newer experienced workers.

Finally

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, Overall, having a society

that is

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averagely younger, would reduce the necessary payments made to the jubilated people.

However

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, I believe that having a lack of seniors would develop a hazardous system damaging the economy and the entire country, overweighting the jubilation advantages.

Submitted by Kra0s22 on Wed May 11 2022

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

In today's fast paced world, many individuals struggle with delaying or positioning tasks Dicuss causes of this and suggest an effective solution to overcome it

Examine the arguments in favour and against animal experiments, and come to a conclusion on this issue.

Modern buildings appear in large numbers, but some people believe that we should build our buildings in traditional styles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There are many female students who finish degrees in science and technology courses at university, but few move into the workplace after they graduate. Why is this? What measures can be taken to encourage them into work? Situation

Task 2 People live longer in some part of the world. What do you think is the reason of this? Is this a good thing or a bad thing?