IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

It seems clear that obesity in today’s society is to some extent due to the availability of fast food. Should governments place a tax on fast food to reduce the amount of fast food consumed?

#obesity #today’s #society #availability #food #governments #place #tax #amount
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Nowadays obesity in society is an overwhelming problem. One of the main causes of obesity is the availability of fast
food
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. Fast
food
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 is popular since it is available everywhere on the street and is cheaper than other
food
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.
Also
Linking Words
, it is easier and faster to buy and eat in a limited time. The government can reduce the amount of
fast
Add a hyphen
fast-food
show examples
food
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 consumed by placing a
tax
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 on fast
food
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. Fast
food
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,
for example
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, burgers and fries, is popular among children, teenagers and workers because it is the most affordable meal available and it is easy to find.
Also
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, it is easy to consume in a rush hour,
for example
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, eating in the car while travelling to places or eating in the office while working. With the
tax
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 on fast
food
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, the amount of fast-
food
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 consumed would be reduced because lesser
people
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 would be able to afford it.
However
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, fast
food
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 is
also
Linking Words
 a source of
food
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 for
people
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 with low income so that they can pay lesser for
food
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. If the fast-
food
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 price increased, there would be other problems in society
such
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 as poverty and stealing
food
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. The government should place a
tax
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 on fast
food
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 but
also
Linking Words
 should reduce the
tax
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 on other types of healthy
food
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 to make it more accessible for everyone, even with lower income. If more
people
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 could afford healthier
food
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,
people
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 would be less obese. In conclusion, in my opinion, governments should place a
tax
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 on fast
food
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 to reduce obesity but
also
Linking Words
 should promote and encourage
people
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 to eat healthier
food
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Linking Words
instead
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ofinstead
show examples
 by reducing the
tax
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 on other healthy
food
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.
Submitted by pearl12346 on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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