IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

In some cultures, children are encouraged to compete against each other. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this approach?

#cultures #children #approach
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some countries, specifically in many families, try to create a sense of competition in
children
Use synonyms
. If youngsters are against each other, on one side, they can improve in their life or be impressed by
others
Use synonyms
;
nevertheless
Linking Words
, they may be negatively impacted. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I explain both its advantages and disadvantages. On the positive side, contests among
children
Use synonyms
 may improve their study and develop creativity. Some
children
Use synonyms
 need some encouragement and force, which results in envying
others
Use synonyms
' success in starting their tasks like studying for exams.
For instance
Linking Words
, provided that
children
Use synonyms
 observe
others
Use synonyms
' good grades, they feel they are far from that achievement; their thoughts work like a force to their affords.
In addition
Linking Words
, if teachers compliment hardworking students,
others
Use synonyms
 would be influenced by top-grade students to how to study more to achieve teachers' compliments.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 competition can increase stress and cause pupils to lose their friends. Generally,
children
Use synonyms
 could not manage their feelings and their anxiety level since competitions may have been considered seriously among them, which can affect their minds. Some achievements are highly important for students like a good mark on an important quiz but being fail on that may increase stress.
Moreover
Linking Words
, provided that they failed in some work, they become angry.
Consequently
Linking Words
, they may have aggressive
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 towards their friends, especially if they are successful. In conclusion, I believe competition in
children
Use synonyms
 can have both positive and negative effects. Sometimes it has provided improvement and encouragement and may cause anxiety and loneliness in
children
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by kimiasphri on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: