Nowadays celerities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the modern era, it is generally acknowledged that the number
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
incomes of
people
Use synonyms
who are famous is bigger than that of
politicians
Use synonyms
because
celebrities
Use synonyms
have
advertising
Correct article usage
an advertising
show examples
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
and have done a lot of effort.
This
Linking Words
is a beneficial progression as they can contribute to the country and the public’s awareness.
To begin
Linking Words
with, an excessive amount of practice is required to be successful stars, and
therefore
Linking Words
the population is impressed
at
Change preposition
with
show examples
their hard training.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
tend to
willing
Add a missing verb
be willing
show examples
to pay
money
Use synonyms
for their
celebrities
Use synonyms
. A majority of Koreans love to pay
money
Use synonyms
for Yuna Kim who is a successful figure skater since the Korean public saw her feet that are hurt by her practice when she was young.
Moreover
Linking Words
, due to the attention of citizens,
celebrities
Use synonyms
can gain excessive
money
Use synonyms
. While the public
tend
Change the verb form
tends
show examples
to think that
politicians
Use synonyms
are boring, they believe that popular
people
Use synonyms
who are singers, actors, and athletes are interesting. What is more, the population wants to be like them.
As a result
Linking Words
, the attention of the public brings about an advertising effect.
For example
Linking Words
, a post
that is
Linking Words
written by Hae Gyo Song, who is a popular actor in Korea, is valued at
arround
Correct your spelling
around
500,000 dollars.
Hence
Linking Words
, their popularities are the key factor in advertising that brings enormous incomes.
However
Linking Words
, these trends contribute to the country. Not only can word-wide stars earn
money
Use synonyms
from the local population, but they may
also
Linking Words
get
money
Use synonyms
from fans all over the world.
As a result
Linking Words
,
celebrities
Use synonyms
have to pay taxes that increase
the
Change the word
their
show examples
standard of living as the government can allocate state funds that are collected by taxes to public services.
In addition
Linking Words
, if VIPs are sympathetic or want to have a good reputation, they would donate to charities or participate in volunteering for the community. Since the public
tend
Change the verb form
tends
show examples
to mimic their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
people
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
a kind trend will be spread among ordinary
people
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, a survey conducted by Korea University has revealed that
celebrities
Use synonyms
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
are more powerful than
Use synonyms
politicians
Change noun form
politicians'
politician's
show examples
words.
Hence
Linking Words
, earning a lot of
money
Use synonyms
among stars is
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
development progress. In conclusion,
celebrities
Use synonyms
are
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
richer than
politicians
Use synonyms
since the public
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
impressed
at
Change preposition
by
show examples
stars’ efforts and they can
also
Linking Words
advertise efficiently. Their
money
Use synonyms
can be used for the country with the population’s participation.
Submitted by hiasince38 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: