IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some parents think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. . Others think they should begin after 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#parents #children #education #age #years
Formal
education
 is a crucial step in
childrens’
Change noun form
children’s
show examples
 educational life.
Accordingly
, it is
affairing
Correct your spelling
affirming
affairs
 by some people that it should start as soon as possible, whereas others claim that it should start after
age
 7. From my point of view, it is more beneficial if
this
 kind of
education
 gets started after passing 7
years
 old. It is asserted that starting
school
 after
age
 7 is more practical as
children
 undergo less
stress
. Having finished the primary stages of
brain
 advancement till 7
years
 old,
child’s
Correct article usage
a child’s
show examples
brain
 is ready to start schooling .Needless to say that while a child is rising, their mind is passing the
process
 in which visual, and comprehension level is developing.
This
process
 is at its most level until the
age
7
Change preposition
of 7
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 when a child can comprehend almost all aspects of lessons, so they will not have
stress
 during formal
education
.
For instance
,
children
 less
that
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
 7
years
 old at
school
 can not comprehend lessons as they are complicated for their
brain
, and hard to analyse so they get
stress
Wrong verb form
stressed
show examples
.
In addition
,
age
 7 is the time when
children
 are more independent. Compared to a3-5 year-old
children
, a
7 year old
Add a hyphen
7-year-old
show examples
 one has
Add an article
a
show examples
higher level of
independency
Correct your spelling
independence
show examples
, so the stage of starting
school
 is easier since the child
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not ask for
parents
sitting
Change the verb form
to sit
show examples
 beside them .If they were infants, they would ask for meeting
parents
 all the time.
For instance
, in kindergarten
children
 cry more asking to join their
parents
 which
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
learning
Correct article usage
the learning
show examples
process
 harder.
On the other hand
, some argue that it is better to start schooling at early
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
 due to faster learning speed in childhood.
In other words
, since childhood is a time when acquiring knowledge like learning a foreign language is faster (
brain
Add an article
the brain
show examples
 has its highest performance), some
parents
 prefer to start schooling in small
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
 to gain out of
this
 golden period. It has
witnessed
Add a missing verb
been witnessed
show examples
 among small
children
 who wanted to learn a new language, only after a few repetitions they can talk easily while older ones consider
this
process
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a hard way. In conclusion,
Although
 it is believed by some people that starting
school
 at early
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
 could be practical because of faster learning speed during childhood, the idea that having formal
education
 after 7
years
 old has better consequences because of less
stress
 and independency of
children
.
Submitted by shahlad on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: