IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #choices
Some Humans tend to believe
that vast alternatives
Change the determiner
that vast alternative
those vast alternatives
show examples
 are available for
us
Correct your spelling
use
show examples
 in
current
Add an article
the current
show examples
 era. I completely agree with the given statement. In
this
 essay, I would describe
reasons
Correct article usage
the reasons
show examples
 in detail for that. At the outset, If we imagine ourselves in past times, say in the decade of 1980 or 1990 we have limited
options
 to choose from. Innovation and technology
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 changed our lives entirely.
For instance
, in earlier times we had to communicate via letter or fax only and that
also
 took so long. But, nowadays we are having numerous
options
 to communicate. We can mail,
fax
Correct word choice
or fax
show examples
 and
fastest
Correct article usage
the fastest
show examples
 available option is phone call and text.
Specially
Replace the word
Especially
show examples
, after the creation of social networking sites.
Thus
, we find abundant
options
 to select from.
Furthermore
, if we talk about mode of transport, in back decades we had insufficient
options
 and had to cope
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with what was available. Luxury and amenities were rare and
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
too limited for
elite
Add an article
the elite
an elite
show examples
 class.
Nevertheless
, in recent times,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
transportation has become affordable. Not only that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
 offers
variety
Add an article
a variety
show examples
 of modes. We can go by
two wheelers
Add a hyphen
two-wheelers
show examples
, rickshaw,
four wheeler
Add a hyphen
four-wheeler
show examples
, steamer, aircraft, chopper, metro trains, mono trains and the list goes on.
Availability
Correct article usage
The availability
show examples
 of these
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
options
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 made our life so easier! To conclude, I can say that we are definitely in possession of Numerous
Options
 in
contemporary
Add an article
the contemporary
show examples
 era. I believe that completely.
Submitted by rohanmehta2477 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
What to do next:
Look at other essays: