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Writing Samples
Band 6

2 The education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However, educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#education #people #countries #adults #governments #money
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They say
education
Use synonyms
 is the key to success.ln many countries, educating younger people is a number one priority
however
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 it is argued that it is
also
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 important to educate
adults
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 who are unable to read or write and the state must spend
money
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 on them.l moderately agree with
this
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 statement.
This
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 essay will discuss why l do not fully support the idea. On the
first
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 hand,
education
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 will remain the key to unlocked doors so
then
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 it is of utmost importance that it is prioritized for the future generation. Spending loads of
money
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 on children
Add the comma(s)
,
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for example
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, giving them free
education
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 will reduce the number of illiterate
adults
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 ,
therefore
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 , they won't be any need for adult
education
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.
This
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 concludes my point on why I do not agree with the point
if
Correct your spelling
of
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 spending lots of
money
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 on adult
education
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.
On the other hand
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, spending
money
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 on adult
education
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 is a backward development
although
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 it will assist them with the critical skills, The government will spend
huge
Add an article
a huge
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 amount of time and resources because it takes more time and energy to literate an older person compared to the younger one.
For example
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, it is proven scientifically that the brains of children are
more
Change the word
apply
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spongier than
older
Add an article
the older
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generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
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 they can absorb different things in a short period of time. Learning to a child is more interesting than to
adults
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. To sum up, looking at the points discussed, it is more advantageous to promote and prioritize
education
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to
Change preposition
for
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 younger children
instead
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 of
adults
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.
This
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 will help to reduce the rate of illiterate aged people.
Submitted by Kally199226 on

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • literacy programs
  • functional illiteracy
  • social mobility
  • inter-generational poverty
  • workforce development
  • economic growth
  • social cohesion
  • public health
  • civic participation
  • resource allocation
  • national development
What to do next:
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