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Writing Samples
Band 6

In a number of countries some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities .Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport . Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In several
nations
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,nations
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 some individuals deliberate that it is mandatory to spend huge amounts of money on constructing new railway
lines
Use synonyms
 for fast trains between towns.While others are of the opinion that money should be used to upgrade current public
transport
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,in
this
Linking Words
essay
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,essay
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 I will examine both views and provide a plausible conclusion.
To begin
Linking Words
with
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,with
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 new rail
lines
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 are fast , efficient and suitable for
people
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 with tedious work timetables
such
Linking Words
 as businessmen or women.It is because they have countless meetings and businesses in various towns or cities.
Therefore
Linking Words
 the construction of new and sophisticated railway
lines
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 improves the quality of
transport
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 and saves time.
For
Linking Words
instance
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,instance
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 old trains take longer to
transport
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 goods or
people
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 up to 8-12 hours whereas a speed train can spend about 1-3 hours on a 500 km journey.
Hence
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 efficient technology improves
Use synonyms
transport
Correct article usage
the transport
show examples
 system for busy
people
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 and carriage which needs to be transported faster to their destinations.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
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,hand
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 other
people
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 think that the existing
transport
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 network should be maintained and improved.
This
Linking Words
 is because some of the old transportation is still functional and requires minimal
repairs
Use synonyms
 to
transport
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 the citizens again.
For
Linking Words
example
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,example
show examples
 in
Zimbabwe
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,Zimbabwe
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 there is a company called Zimbabwe United Public Commuters (Zupco) which has been in existence for over 25 years.All because of poor maintenance the buses started developing mechanical faults so there is need to repair and restore function to improve the current public
transport
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.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,due to countless
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repairs
Add a comma
,repairs
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 the buses might start to break down again and if the benefits of buying a brand new bus are weighed versus several
repairs
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 it is worth
to acquire
Change the verb form
acquiring
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 a new one. In conclusion,new railway
lines
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 help some
people
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 to save time because of the efficiency and
convinience
Correct your spelling
convenience
convenient
.
However
Linking Words
 old existing
transport
Use synonyms
 can be maintained as it requires minimum
repairs
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 to restore normal functionality.
Hence
Linking Words
, in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 I think that it is important to spend money on new railways that
adapts
Change the verb form
adapt
show examples
 to the technology and current trends.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
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