As well as making money, also business have social responsibilities.Do you agree or disagree?

#money #business #responsibilities

Many large

businesses

have important improve the

societies

. So, not only making money but their

businesses

also

have significant responsibilities to improve the

societies

. I personally agree with

this

message, and my supportive

agruments

Correct your spelling

arguments

will be outlined in the following paragraphs. The large

businesses

play significant roles to improve the

societies

into

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

another step which the

businesses

run regally and have a lot of trustworthy will improve the

societies

into the right sides

such

businesses

that have no drugs or

controlled

Add a missing verb

are controlled

show examples

by mafia will provide a better life to the population in cities as well as better life of

population

Add an article

the population

show examples

in the countries.

Moreover

, the

businesses

that have high

competition

will

alway

Correct your spelling

always

lunch the

services

or gadgets that can make

ours

Correct the word

our

show examples

life-styles

Correct your spelling

lifestyles

show examples

Change the word

apply

show examples

easier, and they will never stop

develop

Wrong verb form

developing

show examples

their

services

because they have many competitors

want

Correct pronoun usage

who want

show examples

to beat them down.

This

competition

is directly benefits

Change preposition

apply

show examples

customers like us because customers will always have better gadgets and

services

from their

businesses

competition

to make our life

Change the word

apply

show examples

easier than before. In conclusion, the large business

competition

will improve the

population

Change noun form

population's

show examples

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

life-style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

into

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

another step, and provide their customers

Add the preposition

with a

show examples

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

better gadgets and

services

all the time.

Submitted by detch2543 on Fri May 27 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

201 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

social responsibilities
contribute
well-being
community
philanthropy
sustainability
ethical
trust
reputation
accountable
profit-making
balance

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
All over the world societies are facing growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adult. What are the reason for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?
There is no doubt that obesity is becoming a severe issue around the world. This illness has a harmful effect on both children and adults. This essay will explain the root and the measures we should take to remedy this problem.
5
band
Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programs (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?
A group of people discuss about the highschooler going to participate in free social work like raising funds, coaching kids sports, and helping their neighbours. This discussion is running about whether the unpaid social work for teenagers is mandatory or not and the reason behind them.
7
band
Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skill and more creative than reading to what extent do you agree or disagree use reason and specific example for to explain your answer.
Nowadays,the stages of growth and development have a pivotal role in a kid's life.During each developmental milestone,they grow physically and mentally.By doing fascinating play with a baby can develop their ability,and they become more creative than learning books.I strongly agree with this statement.This essay will discuss the reasons for the agreement in detail ,along with a relevant conclusion.
6.5
band
Many young children have unsupervised access to the internet and are using the internet to socialize with others. This can lead to a number of dangerous situations which can be threatening for children. what problems do children face when going online without parental supervision? How can these problems be solved?
It is often argued that most young children have free access to the Internet and are using the Internet to interact with others. In this way, several dangerous situations can be scary for children. This essay will first discuss one of the main problems associated with being cheated by bad people and then will suggest a viable solution.
7
band
Giving lectures in halls to large numbers of people is an outdated method of teaching. With the technology available today there is no justification for it, and everything should be done online. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays giving live lectures in large halls is considered to be an old-fashioned method by some people since improvement in the availability of technology in all aspects of our lives has shrunk the need for physical lectures. I completely agree with the aforementioned statement due to the fact that the online learning process is more customized according to the students' needs and does not require physical attendance which makes it an even more preferable option among people.

As well as making money, also business have social responsibilities.Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

All over the world societies are facing growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adult. What are the reason for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programs (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skill and more creative than reading to what extent do you agree or disagree use reason and specific example for to explain your answer.

Giving lectures in halls to large numbers of people is an outdated method of teaching. With the technology available today there is no justification for it, and everything should be done online. To what extent do you agree or disagree?