Some people think living in big cities is bad for people's health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Big
cities
like New York are significantly popular places since there are a large number of shops and facilities.
Therefore
, many citizens are likely to move
big
Change preposition
to big
show examples
cities
for seeking a better life than
country sides
Correct your spelling
countrysides
show examples
.
However
, certain
people
consider that living in big
cities
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
a bad effect on
citizen's
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens'
show examples
health
conditions.It is agreed that
this
view by discussing two observations.
To begin
with, large
cities
are tend
Change the verb form
tend
show examples
to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more dirty air condition because of
many
Correct article usage
the many
show examples
traffics. It has become clear that the
people
who live in big
cities
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
likely to have
health
problems including
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lung cancer by the Japanese government.
For instance
, a report conducted by Tokyo university illustrated that the lifespan of
people
who live in Tokyo was 3.2 years shorter than
Iwate
Change preposition
in Iwate
show examples
which is one of the famous
prefecture
Change to a plural noun
prefectures
show examples
as a suburb.
Therefore
,
this
makes clear that dirty air
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
in big
cities
lead to
increasing
Replace the word
increase
show examples
diseases and decreasing the lifespan.
Moreover
,
noises
in big
cities
have a bad effect on
people
's mental
health
.
For example
, the citizens who live in busy areas always hear large
noises
because of facilities including restaurants and clubs. Due to
this
situation, the quality of
sleeping
Replace the word
sleep
show examples
is quite poor,
result
Change the form of the verb
resulting
show examples
in a lack of concentration for working.
Addition
Change preposition
In addition
show examples
to that, some
doctores
Correct your spelling
doctors
consider that kind of
people
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
inclined to have mental issues.
Thus
, it becomes apparent that
noises
in large
cities
make
people
's conditions worse. To sum up, big
cities
have the worse air condition and the problem of
noises
Fix the agreement mistake
noise
show examples
, owing to
this
situation, living
large
Change preposition
in large
show examples
cities
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
a bad impact on many citizens. It is true that big
cities
are quite fancy with many attractive facilities,
conversely
, living there can not
supported
Change the verb form
support
be supported
show examples
definitely because of bad effects
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
our body. After
thorough
Add an article
a thorough
show examples
analysis of
this
subject, it is predicted that our society should consider
seriously
Correct pronoun usage
it seriously
show examples
and select the city where we live for our
health
.
Submitted by lyu on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • respiratory problems
  • population density
  • stress levels
  • mental health issues
  • sedentary lifestyles
  • healthcare facilities
  • cardiovascular diseases
  • psychological well-being
  • recreational areas
  • social networks
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