IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Environmental problems are caused by technological development. Some people say that the solution to these problems is for everyone to lead a simpler way of life while others say that technology can solve these problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#development #people #life #technology
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The
world
's environment in
Add a hyphen
present-day
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present
Add an article
the present
show examples
 day
are
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is
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 damaged more than
the
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in the
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 past because of the development in
technology
industrial
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industries
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. There are some
people
think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
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 that
technology
have
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has
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 significant
develop
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development
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 and some kind of
technology
 can cure the environment's
problems
,
in contrast
, some
people
 suggested
people
 should solve environmental
issues
with
Change preposition
in
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 an organic way. In the following paragraphs, the supportive reasons
of
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for
show examples
 each
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
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view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
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 will be outlined in detail. The development
in
Change preposition
of
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 technological industries
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
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 important
roles
Fix the agreement mistake
role
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 in the present society, but their footprints affected a lot
to
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of
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world's
Correct article usage
the world's
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 environment.
Then
, there are some
people
think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
show examples
 technologies in
Add a hyphen
present-day
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present
Add an article
the present
show examples
 day can
significnt
Correct your spelling
significantly
significant
 solve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental
issues
.
However
, the
technology
 that can cure the environmental
problems
 still
produce
Correct subject-verb agreement
produces
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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pollution in their production lines and can cause more damage to the
world
 which
is not cure
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does not cure
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 the
world
.
On the other hand
, many
people
 suggested organic ways to tackle the environmental
issues
such
 as growing more trees, increasing
animal's
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animal
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 habitats, and reducing
pollutions
Fix the agreement mistake
pollution
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.
Moreover
, environmental
issues
 which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
solving
Wrong verb form
solved
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 with organic ways will not increase more pollution to the
world
 which
is not cause
Change the verb form
is not causing
show examples
 more damage like using
technology
 to solve environmental
issues
. In conclusion, there are so many practical solutions to deal with environmental
problems
 in both technologies and
orgnic
Correct your spelling
organic
 ways which
is have
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 different advantages and disadvantages. The
oraganizations
Correct your spelling
organizations
 who have direct responsibilities
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the
world
's environmental
issues
 should
counsult
Correct your spelling
consult
 as soon as possible to announce the regulations that can tackle these
problems
down
Change preposition
apply
show examples
for better health of
people
 and the
world
.
Submitted by detch2543 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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