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Writing Samples
Band 7

Crime appears to be rising in most countries in the world, especially among young people. What are the possible causes of this trend, and what solutions would be effective reducing crime. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#crime #countries #world #people #trend
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It is said that the number of crimes committed by younger
people
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 is increasing globally. Among the many possible causes, the origin of
this
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 growing trend could be the negligence of
parents
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 and
teachers
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, and the principal solution appears to be enhancing parental support and the education system.
First
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 of all, most
people
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 often learn the concepts of prohibited and nonprohibited actions in society from their
parents
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 and
teachers
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 at a relatively young age. Unfortunately, not all
people
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 grow up with full parental support to help them achieve a sense of responsibility and self-control.
For example
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, many
children
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 tend to live with negligent or uninvolved
parents
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 as well as some may not even have
parents
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 to guide them through childhood, which is a critical period that can shape their future identities. Another problem seems to be the failure of
teachers
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 and educational institutes to address the
children
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’s need to develop some social skills that are proven helpful to prevent them from committing a criminal act. As for the solutions, an obvious step would be encouraging
parents
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 to improve their communication with their
children
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. If
parents
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 could effectively teach their
children
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 the ways of mastering self-discipline and restraint from perpetrating delinquency, it would immensely reduce the number of young offenders committing crimes. A
second
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 remedy might be for the educational institutes and
teachers
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 to offer distinctive programs or courses that encourage students to learn specific social skills and to appreciate the feeling of involvement in their community, which may help
children
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 grow into more empathetic and socially involved individuals. If
children
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 had a stronger sense of responsibility as a part of the community, they would be less likely to engage in illegal activities. In summary, the factors of parenting and educational shortcomings appear to be the main reasons. Well-versed parenting and teaching may be an effective method of reducing crime among younger
people
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.
Submitted by khongorzul.am on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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