IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

An increasing number of people are now using the internet to meet new people and socialize .some people think this has brought people closer together while others think people are becoming more isolated. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #internet
Recently, meeting and socialising with somebody on the
internet
 is so popular with rising technology. Though some
people
 believe with
this
 method
people
 are closer together, others think
people
 are becoming less social and in depression. In my view, they are becoming more isolated. I will talk about both sides and explain why I agree with the opinion that they are more alone.
Firstly
, the
internet
 helps
people
 keep in touch with each other for a long time. Everybody admits that
life
 is easier with the
internet
 with rising technology. Even though
people
 will be old, they can find new friends or access very quickly their children. When
people
 are bored, they can talk with new
people
 or play online games. But in all
this
 activity, they are alone. When they meet each other, they are still using their phones to find or connect with other
people
.
People
 are selfish, every time they want more than more.
People
 are in a social media bubble.
However
, they seem like very close, they are
further
 than past. Most
people
 lie about their
life
, and act like everything is perfect and there is no problem in their
life
.
For example
, even their faces are very different from real ones with social media filters. When they follow each other every day and every time, in their opinion they are so close, but more connection brings no connection with
this
 fake
life
.
Hence
,
this
 is not friendship, it is just fake friendship. To conclude,
although
people
 can access or find each other very fast, they are acting in social
life
. They do not want to share their real faces and connect with each other in real
life
.
As a result
 of
this
, most
people
 are alone and like a prison inside the virtual
life
 called the
internet
.
Submitted by es.altintas on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Consumer behavior
  • Virtual marketplace
  • Cybersecurity
  • Digital footprint
  • Return policy
  • Comparison shopping
  • Customer reviews
  • Retail therapy
  • Logistics
  • User interface
  • Payment gateway
What to do next:
Look at other essays: