IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1.5

Describe a historical era you are interested in When was this era How you learn about it What it was famous for Explain why you are interested in

#era
I would like to talk about a historical era I am very impressed
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
.
That is
 the Indochina War and it happened in my country which is Vietnam, I learned about it in
Correct your spelling
high school
show examples
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
show examples
. The primary reason why I chose that moment
because
Add a missing verb
was because
show examples
 that time had made a huge number of real heroes. Among them, I admire the most is Vo Thi
Sau
Change noun form
Sau's
show examples
 sister. She taught me how to
confident
Add a missing verb
be confident
show examples
 when
face
Change the verb form
facing
show examples
 any difficult situation as well as strong enemies.
Moreover
, I learned a lot about patience through Vietnam soldiers when they did deal with significant moments. In effect, the Indochina War affected not only my nation but
also
 worldwide. As I said before, it was well-known for making huge of real heroes.
Therefore
, I was pretty proud of my country's history.
Submitted by amm.banhmi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: