We can see more disasters and violence show on TV What are its cause and what effects will they exert on the individual and the society

#disasters #violence #show #tv #effects #society

In the contemporary world, it is becoming easier to watch violence and disasters on

. The main reason is the stimulating media form as video or image can hold the watchers

into

Correct your spelling

onto

show examples

their couch.

However

, I believe it crossed the marginal line of moral acceptance. I would like to explore why

this

phenomenon has occurred and how

would

Verb problem

apply

show examples

it affects the individual and society.

Firstly

, we need to understand why

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

violence and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

disasters show more often on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shows and commercials. To elaborate, nowadays, people get used to watching

and it does not catch their attention anymore;

thus

, producers

had

Wrong verb form

have

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to find ways to grab their interests.

As a result

of many experimental shows, they found more stimulating content that

are

Change the verb form

show examples

beloved by the people.

In other words

, it was on-demand by the people who were bored by self-duplicated content on

Secondly

, how would those contents

can affect is

Verb problem

apply

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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encourage insecure youngsters aggressive by optical experience and inspire folks to look down on

dignity

Correct article usage

the dignity

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of life

Change the punctuation

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For instance

, in Korea group of teenagers who usually watch violent movies hijack a car and are chased by police.

Accordingly

, another example, study says that raising view rates of the violent show causes an increased rate of crimes and sentenced felonies. To

be concluded

Wrong verb form

conclude

show examples

, it is more than clear to observe that violent and disastrous shows encourage misguided pupils to commit crimes.

In addition

, from a macroscopic perspective, it ruins the value of life throughout the whole society.

Submitted by 8080wjdehdgu on Sat Jun 04 2022

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task response

The essay adequately identifies the causes and effects of the increase in violent and disaster-related content on TV. However, some points lack development and coherence.

coherence and cohesion

The essay generally follows a logical structure, with points being introduced and supported. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more clearly stated and developed.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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We can see more disasters and violence show on TV What are its cause and what effects will they exert on the individual and the society

Include an introduction and conclusion

Today, many people around the globe adapt the Korean culture too much. What problem is associated with this? What can be done about this?

Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantage outweigh the disadvantages?

The process presents information about the water cycle, an unceasing flow of water across and beneath the Earth’s surface.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more environmental problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. with increased use of computers, the internet and smart phones, more and more people are starting to work from home. what are the disadvantages and disadvantages of this development?