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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In many country women are allowed to take maternity leave from their jobs during the first month after the birth of their baby. Do advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#country #women #maternity #jobs #first #month #birth #baby
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There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate about whether women in various nations are permitted to be absent from the workplace in the
first
 month after giving birth to their infant. In my opinion, I would contend that the demerits of
this
 idea cannot overshadow its counterparts. It is evident that
maternity
 policy brings a bunch of favourable influences on women’s physical health. Undeniably, they can have a great deal of quality time to fully recover from pregnancy as well as heal their body with suitable exercises.
For instance
, in Vietnam where female workers are offered six months of
maternity
 leave, many women enhance their health conditions after having newborn babies by taking an effortless stroll in a lush park, enjoying moderate cardio workouts and having low-impact outdoor recreational activities.
Therefore
, leaving their jobs temporarily is a considerably crucial thing for new mothers to bounce back. While the tremendous benefits of having a long break after childbirth are widely acknowledged, its drawbacks still linger, yet they are solvable. Without a shadow of a doubt, if female workers leave their positions for a long period, companies may have to deal with inevitable negative consequences.
In particular
, if new mothers play
head
Add an article
the head
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 of department roles in a firm, the company’s working process would be greatly interrupted and it would suffer from manpower deficiency.
Hence
,
besides
maternity
 leave’s positive impacts on women, it does have some negative ones,
however
, they can be solved. In conclusion,
although
maternity
 policy has some minor downsides, its upsides still play a paramount significant role in every woman's health.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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