IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people say that the best way to increase road safety is to increase the minimum legal age of driving motorbikes or cars .to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #road #safety #age #motorbikes #cars
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, controlling
accidents
Use synonyms
 has become a major concern for the government. Some part of the population argues that the efficient way to increase safety for the people travelling on roads is by increasing the minimum legal
age
Use synonyms
 for driving vehicles. To some extent, I agree with them as there are many policies, the government can implement in order to ensure a decrease in
accidents
Use synonyms
. Some citizens think that increasing the minimum legal
age
Use synonyms
 could increase road safety because these days young people under 18 years of
age
Use synonyms
 are involved in most
accidents
Use synonyms
 since they are beginners and may not even know how to
drive
Use synonyms
 vehicles.
For example
Linking Words
, a recent survey in Hyderabad reveals around 60 per cent of
accidents
Use synonyms
 happened because of youth who were between 18 to 20 years of
age
Use synonyms
. Some of the youth are not mature enough to understand the traffic rules and they neglect them, which results in
accidents
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
, some citizens suggest higher authorities increase the least official
age
Use synonyms
 to mitigate
this
Linking Words
 problem. Apart from that, there are many more reasons why
accidents
Use synonyms
 are happening like drunk driving and not following speed limits. Traffic police officers should constantly keep an eye on the drivers and encourage them to travel within speed limits.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, traffic police should not allow persons to
drive
Use synonyms
 again if they are involved in drunk and driving cases even once in their lifetime.
For instance
Linking Words
, government don't punish folks who are involved in drunk and driving case, there may be a possibility that they may drink and
drive
Use synonyms
 in future as well. To sum up, I agree partly with increasing the official driving
age
Use synonyms
, but the administration has to implement efficient policies like ban folks from driving if involved in drunk and
drive
Use synonyms
 case and a huge fine has to be collected if citizens don't follow traffics rules accurately.
Submitted by saisushanthreddy004 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: