IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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The common
people
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 are always keen to know about the personal
life
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 of
celebrities
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. The
media
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 gives coverage to popular stars
as
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apply
show examples
an
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apply
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when they
apprear
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appear
 in public.
This
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 essay will discuss
about
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apply
show examples
private
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the private
show examples
life
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 of well know
people
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 and
difficulties
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the difficulties
show examples
 being faced due to stardom. The
celebrities
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 are being considered
as
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apply
show examples
an
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apply
show examples
ideal and motivating
personality
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personalities
show examples
 by millions.
People
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 become crazy for a glimpse of their favourite
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sportsman
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sports man
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sportsman
show examples
 or movie personality and
hence
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 maintaining
secracy
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secrecy
security
 of their private
life
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 is very important. All human
being
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beings
show examples
 wish to live
free
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a free
show examples
life
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 without any
inconvinience
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inconvenience
;
however
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,
a
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the
show examples
media
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 always try to capture all movements of
celebrities
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 and air
it
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them
show examples
. Several times, TV channels
shows
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show
show examples
vaction
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vacation
 trips of famous
people
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 without their prior permission. The
media
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 plays a huge role in society. The
media
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 creates paid news for
marketting
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marketing
 and to increase publicity of their channels by any means.
People
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 should respect for private
life
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 of famous
people
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 and
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not interfere in
any one's
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anyone's
show examples
life
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.
Moreover
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,
celebrities
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 themselves should not create hype to stay in limelight and maintain normalcy. The understanding and cooperation of
media
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 and common
people
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 would provide
healthy
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a healthy
the healthy
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 and sustainable atmosphere
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 everyone to live a good
life
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. There is always
price
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a price
show examples
 one has to pay for their achievement and
that is
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 quite higher in
case
Correct article usage
the case
show examples
 of famous personalities. to
payof
Correct your spelling
pay of
 In my view, famous
people
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 shall be treated with great respect and their private
life
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 shall be equally
respeted
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respected
 by
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media
Correct article usage
the media
show examples
 to create good harmonies.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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