IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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There are two different views between
students
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' universities about whether to study other
subjects
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besides
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 their major
subject
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 or focus on their current field of study to improve it. I believe that
students
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 who want to learn about other
subjects
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,
such
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 as history, geography and art, might be more valuable than other
students
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 who focus on their main
subject
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, which lets them be successful in their future careers. On the one hand, some
people
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 are enthusiastic about their field because they believe that
this
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 will allow them to be useful to the public in the future.
In addition
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, they are likely to be capable of solving specific problems in the community.
In particular
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,
students
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 who focus on their main
subjects
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 for a long time
such
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 as medicine, are reasonably good at their own field of study
that is
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 practical and helpful for individuals in
this
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subject
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. On the other side of the coin, if
students
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 want to participate in other
subjects
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, which they might be interested in learning, like history and geography, they might be collecting information about them.
Although
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 they should spend a lot of time reading, searching and so on, about different
subjects
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, they might increase their ability about other aspects of life,
such
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 as knowing about history, which may grow their problem-solving skill and help them learn about things from past, like monument places, or geography which encourage
students
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 to know more about environmental pollution, in
this
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 case, they are going to be able to protect their communities by sharing their knowledge.
Finally
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, from my perspective, university
students
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 who want to learn other
subjects
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 can be more efficient in the community. It is inevitable that the public needs specialised
people
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, but some who learn about more than one
subject
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 are likely to be more practical because they are more aware of several aspects of the
community'
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community's
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 issues,
such
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 as environmental pollution, so they can transfer
this
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 information even between family and friends that can increase
people
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's knowledge. In conclusion, both types of
students
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 are needed by the governments and the public, but I think
people
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 who are interested in learning some other
subjects
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 may have a better effect on their relatives.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure to clearly present your main points in logical paragraphs, each containing a central idea followed by explanations or examples that support it. Your essay could benefit from more explicit development of ideas, with clear topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs.
task achievement
To fully meet the task response criteria, expand your answer to cover all parts of the question. Provide a more nuanced discussion of both viewpoints, and clearly justify your opinion with specific examples and explanations. Avoid general or repetitive statements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
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