Some people think that having a set retirement age for everybody regardless is unfair.They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at easy age.Do you agree or disagree. Which type of workers do you think should be benefit for early retirement. Give reason and example.

#people #retirement #age #everybody #workers #pension #type #benefit #reason

The

age

of withdrawal has been a controversial topic in society for several decades. A number of people consider that it might be better for the community to reduce the

age

that workers retire,

in contrast

, others have a different thought that it is inequitable for some who might have the ability to perform even if they

age

more than the evacuation standard. From my standpoint, I totally disagree with the idea that the population should stop working at an easy

age

because, in society, several populations who are over 60 years old are still able to work effectively,

thus

, employees who are under

this

age

should be able to work as well.

Additionally

, if the community retire earlier, the government has to pay them pensions sooner, whilst the number of citizens who pay the tax declines. Nowadays, numerous organisations scrutinise hiring retired workers to perform with them,

for instance

, Ikea, a well-known corporation, recruits plenty of retired employees to cooperate in their company. The fact is that they believe in the potential and experiences of the retired groups.

Furthermore

this

is the method to make them more valuable.

However

, there are several fields that are suitable for early

retirement

Change the noun form

retirements

show examples

such

as flight attendant. The main reason why

this

career is the group of workers that should be early retired is because working in the aircraft, which is always in an unusual environment, is an indirect way to damage the health in the long term.

Thus

, air hostesses deserve to resign their job before the general retirement

age

. In conclusion, even though there are some occupations that require early retirement, stopping work since they are at a young

age

could be an adverse burden for the state to pay them the pension.

Submitted by chosita1995 on Wed Jun 15 2022

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that having a set retirement age for everybody regardless is unfair.They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at easy age.Do you agree or disagree. Which type of workers do you think should be benefit for early retirement. Give reason and example.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Task 2: Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors, such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People today often use the internet to learn about the culture of other countries. This means that it is not that important to travel to those countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?