Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

#people #life #money

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These days some adults believe that one reason to be happy is spending a lot of cash.

Besides

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, spending

money

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is important but family and

friends

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are important as well. The main reason that the public saying to have

money

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is essential to continue in life is that when you have a lot of

money

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you could follow your dreams.

For example

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, you could invest in your business which is related to your dream job and be employed.

Also

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, you could hire many

people

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and help them.

In addition

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, you could be invested in the stock market and make a lot of

money

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Then

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, you have the effort to buy everything

such

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as cars, houses and other essential needs for your family and make them happy.

On the other hand

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, some wealthy

people

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said that

money

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is not everything. If you have a supportive and good family or some

friends

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whom you can trust and who are loyal is important to be satisfied.

For example

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, some wealthy

people

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always are busy and do not spend time with their families. After a while, they will be depressed and nothing being them happy.

Also

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, you must make some

friends

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and have a fun time together. In conclusion, nowadays because of the need to have

people

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's welfare

money

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is important for society. Because by having the

money

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they could buy everything which they need and be happy.

Moreover

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money

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is a part of our life, but families and

friends

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are more impacts to have a happy life.

Submitted by fatemezand1990 on Wed Jun 15 2022

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Financial security
Basic needs
Comfort
Luxury
Freedom
Altruistic
Philanthropy
Nurturing relationships
Fulfillment
Sense of accomplishment
Physical well-being
Spiritual beliefs
Community involvement
Gratitude
Mindfulness
Simple pleasures

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Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Despite better access to education, many adults today still cannot read or write. In what ways are they disadvantaged? What can governments do to help them?

In some countries, some people are renting accomodation, while other are buying their own homes. Does renting accomodation have more advantages or more disadvantages than buying a place?

Governments should spend more money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Many people say that globalisation and the growing number of multinational companies have a negative effect on the environmental. To what extent do you agree or disagree?