IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that computer and inter are important in children study but other think that students can learn more effectively in school with teachers. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

#people #computer #children #study #students #school #teachers
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In
Modern
Correct article usage
the Modern
show examples
 era, modern technology
such
Linking Words
 as
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and computer are important for
students
Use synonyms
 for their
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
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, but
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 think
students
Use synonyms
 can learn more effectively in
school
Use synonyms
 with
Add an article
a tutor
the tutor
show examples
tutor
Fix the agreement mistake
tutors
show examples
. According to
me
Add a comma
,me
show examples
 the
second
Linking Words
 notion is more appropriate than
Linking Words
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 essay
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 both side merits. Let us examine the arguments in
upcoming
Add an article
an upcoming
the upcoming
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 paragraph with relevant
Correct your spelling
reasons to
reasons
reasonsto
Correct your spelling
reasons to
 reach
concert
Correct article usage
a concert
show examples
 conclusion. Undoubtedly,it is true that modern gadgets like
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 internet and computer are mandatory got
students
Use synonyms
. The digital era plays a great
roll
Correct your spelling
role
show examples
 in
Use synonyms
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
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 life.
Students
Use synonyms
 can attend their
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
 from their
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
 as well as
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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save
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
time. To provide proper education day by day developed new technology. During covid19 which
Add a missing verb
is a
show examples
a
Change the article
an
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 epidemic on the whole world ,
students
Use synonyms
 attend their classes from their
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
childerns
Correct your spelling
children
 were not allowed to go to
school
Use synonyms
. Modern gadgets
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are
Replace the word
able
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abled
Correct your spelling
able
show examples
 to continue their study from home. Eventually, a great innovation is taken by wireless devices,thereby,
students
Use synonyms
 can solve their problems very soon. Nowadays, many apps are launched for online study which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 helpful.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
school
Change the article
a school
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 is a place, where
children 's
Change noun form
children
show examples
 get theoretical as well as practical knowledge.
Adolscence
Correct your spelling
Adolescence
Adolescents
learn
Change the verb form
learns
show examples
 more effectively with their peers and tutors. In
Use synonyms
school
Add a comma
,school
show examples
 they learn about their academic as well as
Correct your spelling
cultural
culturel
Correct your spelling
cultural
,traditional,ethical and moral values. Their physical activities are done by them. Sometimes, they do their assignment with discussion in a group which is more helpful. To conclude, both the views
modern
Change preposition
of modern
show examples
 technology and
school
Use synonyms
 with mentors
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 essential. As far as I am concerned with
Linking Words
second
Change the article
the second
show examples
 notion.
Submitted by saritasangwan017 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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