These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

In the contemporary epoch, there is
irrefutable
Correct article usage
an irrefutable
show examples
quarrel among folk about kids' nurseries managed by immediate fathers
conversely
to the quondam. In
this
essay, I am going to canvass the stated question
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
elucidate on copious motives and
then
interpret why I reckon that it is a positive initiative in the modern age that empowers women in numerous sectors in the forthcoming paragraphs.
To begin
with, the first notion, There are bountiful judicious. The most preponderant is that manifestly, parents are equally responsible for child growth in order to foster a culture and equal opportunities for ladies it is essential.
for instance
, In European ,countries more than 60% of parents
managed
Wrong verb form
manage
show examples
their jobs
according to
their children and fathers take care of them in
absence
Correct article usage
the absence
show examples
of the kids' mothers.
In addition
to
this
, there are numerous other upsides in a plethora of domains and societies. Appreciation to the wide range of advantages it offers, not only does one benefit more when it comes to being effective, but they can enhance productivity and quality of their lives, with much ease, efficacy, and convenience. Needless to say, all these merits stand out in good stead, as far as augmenting the chances of prosperity and excellence is concerned.
On the other hand
, another pivotal factor in the aforementioned proposition is that it is only likely to help one thrive and excel in varied areas.
Besides
, when only one follows
such
a system, can they broaden their horizons,
hence
learning these attributes as dedication and perseverance.
As a result
, it is apparent why myriad petitions that in a positive direction. to cite an example,
According to
a global ,report the trend is topnotch and both parents
divided
Wrong verb form
divide
show examples
their time and take care of their children in order to compete with the external environment. In
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
nutshell,
according to
the
forenamed
Correct word choice
aforementioned
show examples
wrangles, I would like to restate my perspective that the fruitful
vantages
Correct your spelling
advantages
show examples
of taking care of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fathers are indeed too terrific to neglect the isolation and mental illness in the technological era. Hereby, it is a positive tendency.
Submitted by Shabanraza489 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your essay partially addresses the task. Make sure to fully answer all aspects of the question in an organized manner.
coherence cohesion
Your essay shows coherence and cohesion in some parts, but the overall organization and flow of ideas needs improvement. Work on structuring your essay more clearly and effectively.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • breadwinner
  • caregiving
  • paternal leave
  • societal perceptions
  • gender roles
  • flexible working conditions
  • personal preference
  • father-child relationship
  • emotional and social development
  • household responsibilities
  • career opportunities
  • professional achievements
  • balanced parenting
  • earning potential
  • social stigma
  • societal pressure
  • discrimination
  • traditional mindsets
  • resentment
  • adjustment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: