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Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#people #work #hours #time #leisure #activities #situation
Nowadays people
tends
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tend
show examples
 to
work
overtime
 and spend less
time
 on their own
time
such
 as
accompany
Wrong verb form
accompanying
show examples
 family and hobbies. Even though
work
Replace the word
working
show examples
overtime
 can benefit
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
 degree, the
drawdrack
Correct your spelling
drawback
 cannot
be overlook
Change the verb form
be overlooked
show examples
 as well. In my opinion, long
time
 working can have advantages
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 some
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
,
however
, it cannot
under estimate
Correct your spelling
underestimate
show examples
 the problem it caused.
To begin
 with, people working long hours will cause health
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 and stress.
For example
, more and more employees have to
work
 more than ten hours a day. In order to overcome the tiredness, they usually overdose
a
Change preposition
on a
show examples
lot of coffee for making them productive and not feel sleepy. Their
Correct your spelling
mental
mentel
Correct your spelling
mental
 health can be damaged by
this
 unhealthy lifestyle.
Secondly
, working
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
time
 can significantly reduce
personal
Add an article
the personal
show examples
time
 which means less
time
 for family
Correct your spelling
members
member
memeber
Correct your spelling
members
 and socializing. It can cause family conflict and bad
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
.
Last
 but not the least, excessive
overtime
 can drain
Correct your spelling
energy
enery
Correct your spelling
energy
 and creativity which in turn
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
show examples
 productivity. While it is true that working
Correct your spelling
overtime
show examples
over
Correct your spelling
overtime
show examples
time
 can bring more financial income, there are certainly some people
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
show examples
 willing to
work
overtime
 in exchange for making more money for their lives. Apart from
this
, someone
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 to
work
 long hours in order to meet the deadline for their
work
, but
this
 can be avoided by making good
time
 management. In summary,
although
 there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 some
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 working
overtime
, the disadvantage cannot be ignored. It is important to make a
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
work life
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
 balance lifestyle.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • stress relief
  • productivity
  • economic growth
  • career progression
  • skill enhancement
  • quality time
  • financial security
  • leisure activities
  • physical health
  • personal relationships
  • stress-related illnesses
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