IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many developed countries, fast food is cheap and widely available. Many people tend to choose unhealthy options. Why do many people tend to choose unhealthy options? What can governments do to solve this problems?

In various developing nations, fast
food
Use synonyms
 is not
expensive
Add an article
an expensive
the expensive
show examples
 and extremely obtainable product.
That is
Linking Words
 the reason why
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 make a choice for inappropriate
food
Use synonyms
 options. The main problem is about
cost
Use synonyms
 and the most valuable solution is to cut prices on healthy
food
Use synonyms
. The principal problem associated with regular ordering unhealthy
food
Use synonyms
 is the
cost
Use synonyms
, which is given for it. The issue is about an attractive advertisement of
food
Use synonyms
 that shows up a low
cost
Use synonyms
 of
products
Use synonyms
 that actually taste appropriate.
However
Linking Words
, the way how it
cooked
Add a missing verb
is cooked
show examples
 by frying almost all of the
products
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the menu and
also
Linking Words
pour
Wrong verb form
pouring
show examples
 in a big amount of oil leads to obesity and
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
others
Correct pronoun usage
other
show examples
 diseases. The result of
this
Linking Words
 for consumers
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 decreasing
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of physical activities, depression, and bullying.
For example
Linking Words
,
instead
Linking Words
 of cooking or ordering appropriate healthy
food
Use synonyms
 for lunch, I would rather get some fast
food
Use synonyms
 because of its low price and taste. To tackle
this
Linking Words
 problem the government should decrease the
cost
Use synonyms
 of useful
products
Use synonyms
 in every part of the city
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 markets, cafes, schools, offices and others. The
month
Replace the word
monthly
show examples
 salaries of many
people
Use synonyms
 are not suitable for expensive
products
Use synonyms
 and in order to change
this
Linking Words
 is to just cut prices.
People
Use synonyms
 will get fascinated seeing the low costs.
For example
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 my friend had
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
chose
Wrong verb form
chosen
show examples
 to get a Macdonald's product from delivery, he had changed his mind after recognizing that another convenience café is almost twice cheaper. In conclusion, ordering inappropriate
food
Use synonyms
 is a major issue that can
result
Add the preposition
inresult
fromresult
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to obesity and mental problems,
however
Linking Words
, it can be changed by the government if they will decrease the
cost
Use synonyms
 of
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
food
Use synonyms
 and make it suitable for consumers.

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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