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Band 6

Nowadays people work too hard. What is the reason for this? What should employers do to prevent employees from over working?

#people #work #reason #employers #employees
Nowadays the mass
media
 focuses its attention on the lives of famous
people
.
However
, I believe that
this
 is an important thing for
media
 because celebrities are
people
 who inspire and give lessons related to their everyday experiences.
First
 of all, the public
people
’s life is in the eyes of society the entire
time
. Though they try to avoid the journalists,
thus
 somehow information about their
last
 activities is known in seconds
time
. The reason why the
media
 pay too much attention to well-known
people
’s relationships is that they are been followed by a lot of
people
, so, it gains financial profit.
For example
, The story about the voluntary activities of Angelina Jolie reached a lot of popularity in
media
 because
people
 enjoy reading
news
 about it and forwarding it to others.
Hence
, I totally agree that journalists should invest more
time
 illustrating the lives of notorious
people
. The
second
 reason is that celebrities are interpreted as icons. Their life experience is treated as a precedent.
Moreover
, it helps in a positive way both, the
media
 and the society.
For instance
, the divorce case of
Jonee
Correct your spelling
Jones
 Deep was deeply publicized and highly commented on, which created a lot of emissions, shows,
news
 and publications about the reasons why they get divorced, what were the weaknesses of the heroes and what was the good points to win the court case.
That is
 why the
media
 has
such
 attention on these kinds of
people
 and proves once again the importance of
such
news
 related to well-known
people
. All in all,
media
 ought to spend more
time
 writing posts, articles and
news
 about inspiring
people
such
 as singers, actors and sportsmen, because they connect useful things and feed ordinary
people
 with motivation to become better than yesterday.
Submitted by avoalbu on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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