Some people feel that equality between the genders has already been achieved while others feel there is considerable progress to be made. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

#people #equality #genders #progress

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In present-day society, there has been much discussion about

gender

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equality

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. Some people believe that it has already been made while others think that some progress can be made. In

this

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essay, I will discuss

both

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views and state my opinion. On the one hand, many argue that

gender

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equality

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has already been accomplished owing to the fact that

both

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genders

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can pursue any career and can do anything as long as the law allowed.

For example

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, in the past we used to prohibit women to work, they can do only housework and only a few of them is being in school.

However

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, as society changes

both

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males and females can enter school, be taught and do any jobs they want.

This

Linking Words

is proof that

gender

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equality

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has been achieved.

On the other hand

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, other individuals believe that

equality

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is not happening yet. Due to the fact that there is some physical difference between

genders

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that lead to unequal numbers of

gender

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in certain jobs.

For instance

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, some certain jobs like

Correct your spelling

soldiers

soliders

Correct your spelling

soldiers

require physical strength,

hence

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why there are unequal numbers of

genders

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this

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category. Because of

this

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, some development to achieve more

gender

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equality

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can be done. In conclusion,

although

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the law is allowing

both

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genders

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to do anything , in the end, there are always some grey areas that can’t be decided, is it already achieved or not. But most important thing is that we need to judge

both

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genders

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as the same but still need to be aware of their physical differences.

Submitted by thanitwongmasath on Sat Jun 25 2022

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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