People who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyle and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #illnesses #lifestyle #diets #health #care

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More money must be paid

Change preposition

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those individuals who become sick

due to

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uncontrolled diet and sedentary lifestyles.

Such

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behaviour causes unnecessary strain on the health care system and negatively affects the GDP of the country. so getting a high premium is one type of punishment to them and some benefit to the government in the form of revenue. I completely disagree with the notion because it will create discrimination against a particular class of citizens.

Therefore

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, we should look for other more acceptable options.

To begin

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with, a number of people indulge in eating fast food, drinking and refrain from active living and eventually becoming obese, having heart issues and diseases like diabetes.

This

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means that those adults become repeat visitors to healthcare institutions.

Furthermore

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,occupy more hospital beds and staff

as well as

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apparatus compared to a healthy population.

Moreover

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, they remain sick all the time meaning their contribution to the workforce of the nation will be nearly zero.

In addition

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, the cost of treating them will be exponentially higher than that of normal humans. Rather than making them pay high fitness premiums, we should encourage similar groups toward healthier options like joining

Correct article usage

apply

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yoga, and Zumba classes and using healthy food.

Although

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this

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will take away part of the money from the payment,it will alleviate the well-being burden in the long run.

Additionally

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, it will give back self-esteem and working potential to patients.

Hence

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, it will be a win-win for both the parties and society as a whole. Even though the government will lose funds, it will recover them through the taxes paid by the individuals after starting work and not using the energy system. In conclusion, I am cent per cent against the higher fitness dividend from the default population for the sake of justice and equality among communities.

Submitted by mahesh029 on Tue Jun 28 2022

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12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

301 words

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People who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyle and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people think that the best way to solve global environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the responsibility is with the government to control the rise in obesity in children, others think the parents are the cause. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Write a letter to the retailer to complain. In the letter: – Explain why you are unhappy – Request a refund – Make arrangements to return the damaged item