Most schools are planning to replace sports and exercise with more academic sessions. How will this change affect children's lives in your opinion?

#schools #sports #exercise #sessions #change #children #lives

It is certainly true that pupils are the future of tomorrow and an education play a significant role to make their career bright. It is generally claimed that at present educational institutions are removing physical

activities

from their syllabus in the educational curriculum. I think

this

is a negative development as it has harmful effects on

students

which I will substantiate

further

in the upcoming paragraph.

To begin

,with sinister effects of having no

sports

activity in learners syllabus. If a student does not have games in their schedule

then

they would spend sedentary life since they will sit long hours in a class in front of laptops without doing any exercise.

Consequently

, they will face myriad issues in their life

such

as depression and suffer from obesity disease.

For instance

, In developing countries like

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

India most schools do not allow physical exercises in the learning institutes

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

as result

students

do not perform well in the curriculum.

Moreover

students

' hidden talents are not exposed to other

activities

like the soccer and rest of the games .

This

is due to teachers just focusing on study rather than

sports

Therefore

, some learners do not perform well in studies as they are interested in physical

activities

and their talent will not be exposed.

On the contrary

,if children focus on study rather than

sports

then

it would be fruitful for them. Because currently to get a good job,

students

need to learn different subjects and

also

learners have enough time at home in the evening to play games and relax their minds.

Thus

, to make their career successful in different profession student just learn these courses in school. A good illustration is today schools are teaching numerous languages like French, and Italian in their syllabus

instead

of having

sports

so that

students

can learn these languages and easily get jobs or travel around the world. I am convinced that teenagers must have one break in school to relax their minds and divert more attention to their studies. In conclusion, it is learning academics must add physical

activities

to their timetable to overcome various issues like depression and

also

find another talent like sportsperson in a pupil.

Submitted by komal03892 on Tue Jun 28 2022

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

364 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Most schools are planning to replace sports and exercise with more academic sessions. How will this change affect children's lives in your opinion?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

some people think that the parents of children who commit crimes should also receive a punishment . To what extend do you agree or disagree ?

number of children who drop the scool is increasing in some countries.what are the reasons and solutions to overcome this problem.

Large shopping malls are replacing small shops. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Children who start reading earlier in life perform better later on in their school studies. How important are early reading skill in a child's academic performance? What other preschool factors influence a child's later academic achievements?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.