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Band 5.5

What is taught in schools is not useful, as to what is learned outside the school, your opinion?

#schools #school
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What is the charm of learning in a
school
Use synonyms
, if you can attend exceptional courses outside it?
That is
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 the vexed question of people nowadays. I,
on the other hand
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, put the weight in the favor of studying skills
besides
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 the academy. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss my opinion to reach a viable conclusion.
First
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 and foremost, it is a great concern that if you want to excel in your life with success,
then
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 you must train yourself hard, to cope with challenges.
Therefore
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, presently, numerous institutions are established, that can help a pupil scale up their skill, in their field of interest, apart from the
school
Use synonyms
 education. To demonstrate, one can easily distinguish whether the problem-solving skill of a person who is coached outside the
school
Use synonyms
, is far better than one, who is not.
Furthermore
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, specialized coaching
also
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 brightens up the chances of acquiring a white-collar job.
For Instance
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, If you've experienced an in-demand skill-set, prospects for you to attain a promising job will surge. As a rule of thumb, it has been observed that enterprises always prefer candidates who have acquired hands-on experience in the skill, they have advertised.
In contrast
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, looking at the other side of the coin, it is evident that
teachings
Correct article usage
the teachings
show examples
 of the
school
Use synonyms
 are
also
Linking Words
 undeniably essential for the cognitive development of children's
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
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, in their formative years.
For example
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, primary education incorporates basic moral values and provides significant growth to a child's character,
thus
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,
also
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helps
Wrong verb form
helping
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 them in social interactions, in later stages. To recapitulate,
although
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, primary training in the schools is of utmost importance for a student's mental growth both pragmatically and socially.
However
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, I still believe that studying after
school
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 will improvise a pupil's expertise level.
Submitted by ehunt2002 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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