At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
In recent years, there has been a demographic trend that shows a larger proportion of young adults than that of older people.
This
essay will argue that the advantages of this
outweigh the drawbacks. The essay will first demonstrate that this
shift comes with a more competitive workforce and that it brings added benefits to social welfare, followed by an analysis of how the primary disadvantage, particularly the shortage of craftsmen, is not valid.
The main benefit of a higher concentration of the working-age population is that it contributes to more productive groups of employees since this
demographic will bring a steady flow of ideas and freshness; besides
, their technological proficiency can lead to increased output, which altogether revolutionizes innovation and accelerates economic growth. A 25-year-old AI enthusiast named Roy Allela, for instance
, is the brain behind the invention of smart gloves which can turn sign language into audible language so that those with disabilities can now integrate socially. Furthermore
, the younger generation helps ease the burden of welfare dependency that has resulted from an ageing population, as they can support the government through their tax liability. For example
, Denmark and Finland are two of the developed countries that can ensure pensions and healthcare effectively thanks to long-term tax payments from younger workers.
Those opposed to this
claim that an imbalance in age can lead to a lack of craftsmen in certain sectors, which may cause the disappearance of some traditions. However
, there is no evidence to support this
view, for new generations possess greater brilliance so they are able to inherit intelligence from their predecessors, thus
reviving such
traditions. Take my sibling as an example who is claimed to have been a potential trainee of a workshop where they teach learners to replicate traditional wooden carvings.
In conclusion, the fact that a substantial number of young adults leads to a more quality workforce and an enhanced economy clearly outweighs the flawed argument that it erodes customs.Submitted by banhbao0565 on
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task achievement
You have adequately addressed the task by analyzing both advantages and disadvantages, and your conclusion directly responds to the essay prompt.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a single main idea which helps the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
You have provided specific and relevant examples to support your points, which strengthens your argument.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...