In many countries, teenagers are encouraged to find part time jobs. Some think this is a good development while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#countries #teenagers #part #time #jobs #think #development

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Some people think that encouraging teenagers to

work

part-time

jobs

while studying is a good development whilst the opponents disagree, In my point of view, encouraging teenagers to do part-time

jobs

has good and bad effects.

Thus

this

essay

Add an article

an essay

the essay

show examples

I will discuss the pros

firstly

and

secondly

the cons with relevant examples.

First

and foremost, motivating young adults to

work

while studying has advantages

such

as they learn to manage time from a young age and

also

it will help immensely in their future careers. To elaborate on

this

further

, when children started working they have to manage

work

and

studies

equally. In order to do that learning about time management and

developed

Wrong verb form

developing

show examples

multi-tasking skills.

For instance

, many international

students

migrating to foreign countries do part-time

jobs

to survive.

However

this

does not affect their

studies

and most of them complete their

studies

with flying colours.

Secondly

, working from a young age help

students

to understand the cooperative world and the experience gained

subsequently

benefits them in developing their career because experience teaches us more things than academic knowledge.

Thirdly

, doing odd

jobs

helps financially unstable

students

to complete education in well-reputed institutions.

On the other hand

, motivating young children to do odd

jobs

has its own disadvantages as it affects their

studies

negatively and

also

the financial independence will lead them in the wrong direction. Managing both

work

and

studies

is not an easy task.

This

will create a lot of pressure

consequently

they will suffer from stress and depression.

For instance

, based on research done by Staffordshire university more than thirty per cent of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

university

students

suffer from mental health-related diseases.

Furthermore

, since everyone cannot manage time successfully they will be more interested in

jobs

and be drifted away from completing their

studies

. Financial independence

also

creates a negative impact on their lives as they have the freedom to purchase anything.

Therefore

, they have a higher chance of going in the wrong direction. In conclusion, encouraging young people to do part-time

jobs

has both pros and cons. According to my ,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

view

Add an article

a view

the view

show examples

I agree with both proponents and opponents.

Submitted by Chathusizzie on Wed Jul 06 2022

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16
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

352 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

practical experience
career path
responsibility
time management
teamwork
adversely affect
personal development
financial independence
money management skills
academic performance
networking opportunities
career exploration
professional growth
exploitation
leisure
overall development

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Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

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