IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

We live today in an electronic information age. It is easier to be connected by technology yet many people seem to no closer to feeling happy in their lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#information #age #technology #people #lives
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Nowadays, technological advancement enabled us to stay connected with
people
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 from other parts of the world. Even though
communication
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 has never been easier, many
people
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 believe that it does not improve their level of happiness. In
this
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 essay, I will explain two main reasons why our way of communicating does not increase our happiness.
To begin
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 with, human responds better to physical
interaction
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.
Communication
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, for
human
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humans
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, is more than just exchanging information
to
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with
show examples
 each other. Gestures, mimics, and expressions are
also
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 important parts of
interaction
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;
however
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, a conversation by phone or text messages eliminated these factors. With face-to-face
interaction
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, there are more things involved and both parties are more engaged
to
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with
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 each other. Clearly, in-person
communication
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 is better than virtual. Another important reason is technology
disconnect
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disconnects
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 us from
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people
Correct article usage
the people
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 around us.
For example
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, most
teenager
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teenagers
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 nowadays
prefer
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prefers
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 to talk about their problem to their social media friend rather than to their parents.
As a result
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, parents may lose connection
to
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with
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 their own children, and soon they are going to see each other as strangers.  In conclusion,
communication
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 has never been easier due to modern technology.
However
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, I believe that virtual
communication
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 is not an ideal way for
human
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humans
show examples
 to communicate.
Therefore
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, I think
people
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 should keep virtual conversation to a minimum and engage more in face-to-face
interaction
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.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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