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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #age #work
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A lot of millennial is of the notion that the
retirement
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age
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 should be increased as the life expectancy of humans have risen over
time
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. I partially agree with the aforementioned statement and would state my views for the same. On the one hand, there is an argument that the period of existence of people has significantly increased so the
age
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 criteria for
retirement
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 should be changed so that people can work for a longer period. The add-on advantage of
this
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 concept would be that people will remain occupied with their work and will be more active during their declining
age
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. It will
also
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 act as a solution to kill their alone
time
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 as most of the
time
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 their kids will remain occupied with their own jobs and higher studies. Another school of thought belongs to the idea that the
retirement
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age
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 should not be changed so that retirees can get some quality
time
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 to spend with their family members ,especially spouses. As they were busy earning money for their family during their young days.
Furthermore
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, they will get an opportunity to focus on their favourite past-
time
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 activities or can use
this
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time
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 to learn something new. In conclusion, I believe that the
retirement
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age
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 should not be changed.
However
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, it depends on the choice of the individual whether they want to continue their job or want to learn something new after the stipulated declining
age
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.
Submitted by jyotikhera_2 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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