IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Explain some of the ways in which humans are damaging the environment. What can governments do to address these problems? What can individual people do?

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Since the
second
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 world revolution, humanity has been witnessing the degradation of ecosystems across the globe.
Hence
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, several species worldwide are teetering on the edge of extinction. Since numerous causes for
this
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 destruction are well known, multiple solutions could be put in place to at least reduce
this
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 alarming situation. Economic greed is one of the leading motivations for deforestation.
This
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 is true in several sectors of the economy.
For instance
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, vast
areas
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 of the Amazon were deforested because of mining.
Moreover
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, many countries use non-environmentally friendly electricity sources,
such
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 as carbon-based fuel, because of the high profits these fuels bring to politicians and oil companies. Another cause for the poor preservation of ecosystems is unequal income distribution. Several slams in my hometown,
for example
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, were built in the mountains with preserved green
areas
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 as many families do not have enough money to buy or rent dwellings in urbanized
areas
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. Several actions might be put in place to hamper the destruction of ecosystems. Not only does environmental legislation need to be adopted by several countries, but
also
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 more restricted punishments are necessary against those who break the law. Perhaps, if individuals who committed crimes against nature were sent to prison or received financial penalties, we would have more people respecting the environment.
Furthermore
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, non-fossil fuels should be the choice for electricity production,
such
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 as solar, hydro, and windy power.
Finally
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, more affordable households should be created in
areas
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 that are safe for people and for the environment. In a nutshell, there are several excuses that companies and people use to destroy our ecosystem.
However
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, under no circumstances should we allow those dishonest motivations to destroy our nature
. .
Replace the punctuation
.
...
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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pollution: contamination, emissions, pollutants, industrial waste
  • Deforestation: habitat loss, biodiversity, urban development, logging
  • Climate Change: greenhouse gases, global warming, fossil fuels, renewable energy
  • Overfishing: unsustainable, fish stocks, marine ecosystems, conservation
  • Waste Production: non-biodegradable, plastics, recycling, waste management systems
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