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In today’s world, it’s private companies rather than government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#today’s #world #it’s #companies #government #conduct #research
Nowadays, people are more concerned about their health, which makes the private community willing to investigate scientific investigations. From my perspective, society will get more
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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 when private associations conduct scientific investigations. Let me illustrate my viewpoints in the below paragraph. First of all, private
entities
 would have a strong customer database, which can analyse what kind of services or products can fit with market needs.
For example
, Johnson & Johnson is one of the most famous corporations in the world. They would have an extensive database of customers' needs.
Thus
, they can arrange certain scientific analyses to fit customers' needs.
However
,
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 do not have
such
 resources for consumers which might create a certain difficulty
to provide
Change preposition
in providing
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specific exploration that can fulfil society's needs.
Therefore
, it might be a waste of taxpayers' contributions.
Additionally
, private
entities
 would have a certain budget for scientific exploration, which can make sure their exploration and products can achieve a cost-efficient approach. The private associations should have a strong incentive to ensure their scientific analysis can fulfil the budget as it might
be involved
Wrong verb form
involve
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millions. Because of
this
, the private associations will try to achieve the best results when they decide to have investments. In conclusion, private
entities
 that pay for and conduct most scientific investigations could provide numerous benefits to society as resources are limited. Because of
this
, the government should focus on public needs, like building hospitals and providing medical training to students in order to meet the coming ageing population.
Moreover
, private
entities
 should provide market needs services and medical treatment to customers.
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task response
Ensure that each paragraph supports the main argument clearly and coherently.
coherence cohesion
Improve the organization of your essay to enhance the overall coherence and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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