IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree? Give the reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There is a public debate that the working hours for
workers
Use synonyms
 need to be reduced in order that
labours
Correct your spelling
labourers
show examples
 would have a better relaxing
time
Use synonyms
 at weekends. From my perspective,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 completely agree that a couple more longer weekends would be highly beneficial. Admittedly, a shorter working week can easily enhance
productivity
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that more than 40%
Use synonyms
workers
Change preposition
of workers
show examples
 are always exhausted because of the overload in one working shift. By increasing the day off, employees will have more
time
Use synonyms
 to complete their tasks, leading to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
rose
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
 in
productivity
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, in some countries of Northern Europe,
labours
Correct your spelling
labourers
show examples
 only work for 4 days and they can spend the rest of their
time
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
with
show examples
 their family. Yet, they are still one of the most remarkably economic countries in the world.
Besides
Linking Words
 its benefits in
productivity
Use synonyms
, extending the weekend would
also
Linking Words
 have a great impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 environmental pollution.
While
Linking Words
 a traditional five-day workweek can lead to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 growth in carbon emissions, a longer weekend
time
Use synonyms
 will easily reduce commuting and
less
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
traffic congestion. An excellent example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 is that some recent studies in Australia have shown that their
workers
Use synonyms
's
capability
Fix the agreement mistake
capabilities
show examples
 have increased
more
Change preposition
by more
show examples
 than 27% since their government
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
proposed an accord about shortening the working hours. In conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 strongly believe that a shorter working week will definitely be highly advantageous. Enhanced
productivity
Use synonyms
 and reduced environmental harms are two compelling reasons to
consilodate
Correct your spelling
consolidate
this
Linking Words
 opinion in the working market.
This
Linking Words
 approach would
take
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sharply
increased
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
 not only
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
economic stability but
also
Linking Words
 work-life balance for
workers
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to use formal writing style consistently. For example, using 'I' in lowercase can be corrected.
coherence cohesion
Include more varied connectors and transitions to enhance the flow between paragraphs and ideas.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively addressing the prompt.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported with relevant examples from different countries, enhancing the argument.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
Look at other essays: