IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

some people spent most of their lives living close to where they were born

The increasing
population
Use synonyms
 in the world have certainly created an in-balance between
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
supply and demand,
Linking Words
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
 a result; it is causing economic issues for all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
, despite whether the particular country is in
developing
Correct article usage
a developing
show examples
 or developed stage. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will be discussing some of the problems that overpopulation causes and
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 solutions to meet
such
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 demands. As basic economic theory suggests, it is vital to
fulfill
Change the verb form
fulfilling
show examples
 humans’ basic needs
such
Linking Words
a
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 food, shelter and clothing. Even though the
population
Use synonyms
 grows, our land areas for farming are quite limited.
Therefore
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,
countries
Use synonyms
 are finding
hard
Correct pronoun usage
it hard
show examples
 to cope-up with the rising demand.
In addition
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, we could clearly see that people are struggling to find
lands
Fix the agreement mistake
land
show examples
 to build their homes. Since 1990,
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
 has lost more than 54% of the forest areas as a consequence of taking those lands for farming and
to build
Change the verb form
building
show examples
 up shelters. We are at a stage where
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
natural resources and livable land areas are very
scare
Correct your spelling
scarce
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,
therefore
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, it is important to find alternative solutions by using modern technology. In certain
countries
Use synonyms
, we could see that farmers are using Ai technology in order to monitor the water levels,
temperature
Correct word choice
and temperature
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 levels and
also
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 monitor the health levels of each plant.
In addition
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, some have already
start
Change the verb form
started
show examples
 using
Add an article
a drone
the drone
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drone
Fix the agreement mistake
drones
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 to
watering
Wrong verb form
water
show examples
 plants and
also
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 to spray chemicals to avoid unwanted diseases.
Furthermore
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, we could see,
Use synonyms
countries
Correct word choice
that countries
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 like Israel
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 already found ways to convert
sea water
Correct your spelling
seawater
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to
Change preposition
into
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 fresh water so they could use
for
Correct pronoun usage
it for
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 their
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
 farming.
This
Linking Words
 essay discussed some of the critical factors we could face due to
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
 in
population
Use synonyms
 and how we could use modern technology to get closer to the equilibrium point of the supply and demand curve. In my opinion, it is important to find new machines and methods by using artificial intelligence in order to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 the basic needs
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 a world where we are experiencing a dramatic increase in
population
Use synonyms
.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Familiarity
  • Comfort
  • Social ties
  • Family ties
  • Belonging
  • Resources
  • Opportunities
  • Fear
  • Unknown
  • Financial constraints
  • Cultural attachment
  • Language barriers
  • Limited education
  • Skills
What to do next:
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