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Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people think that tha government is wasting money on tha art and that this money could be better spend elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

#people #tha #government #money #art
Although
, there is a significant growth in the tendency to allocate
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the
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he
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the
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 national budget
in
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to
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art
Correct article usage
the art
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 sector,but, the
most
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apply
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majority of the society
argue
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argues
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 and
allege
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alleges
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this
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discipline
dicipline
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discipline
 is the source of wasting national wealth,
however
,I completely disagree with the latter
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viewpoint
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view point
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viewpoint
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 ,because
of
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apply
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,investing in
art
 sector has provide
oppurtinuity
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opportunity
 to extend cultural flexibility due to release the emotional states on the
art
 platforms and will build more relaxed people ,
in addition
 of ,
art
 crafts
are be
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are
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 able to boost human perception from their own environment,
as a result
 ,
this
conciousness
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consciousness
 will creating better behaviours in facing the problematic situations on the earth,so,I will bring some piece of the evidence to confirm my opinion.
oppurtinuity
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opportunity
 to extend cultural flexibility due to release the emotional states more relaxed people
accordingly
 to
scientific
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a scientific
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 study
on
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in
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UK
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the UK
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,in 2022, scientists
has
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have
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 been claimed there
is
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are
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 better scores on the anxiety
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questionnaire
questionairre
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questionnaire
 amongst individuals who are living
at
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in
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 the cities with space
of
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for
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art
 preference ,
in
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on
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 another side, people who are in
the
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their
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 hometown that have less than priorities in
art
diciplines
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disciplines
 have higher scores ,so, it is so clear the positive effect of
art
 on the human life ,
similarly
 , dealing with critical situations
such
 as natural disasters or the power of managing in high pace of life n these decades needs to
capability
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the capability
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 of
understanding
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the understanding
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 reality of the world, one neuroscientist has been researched on the human brain when they were in the
sonamy
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economy
 ,
this
 study has been revealed persons who are painters have more tolerance in
this
 position ,
further
,
online
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an online
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 survey has done by the UK reached to
this
 result student who
are
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is
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 playing
a music
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music
a piece of music
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 have gained better scores on their exams. In the end , it is understood investing money to
extending
Wrong verb form
extend
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art
 in the country
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 necessary for having
healthy
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a healthy
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 society with
capability
Correct article usage
the capability
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 to
living
Wrong verb form
live
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 in
this
 world.
Submitted by homa.ebrahimi987 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Economic stimulus
  • Tourism sector
  • Social cohesion
  • Public expenditure
  • Creative industries
  • Philanthropy
  • Government subsidies
  • Fiscal responsibility
  • Civic pride
  • Essential services
  • Public-private partnerships
  • Cultural capital
  • National identity
  • Innovative thinking
What to do next:
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