Some people believe that women should be treated as equal to men when applying for a job with the police or the military. Others think that women are less suitable for this kind of job. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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These days, there are different opinions about equality between

women

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and men in occupations. While many people claim that the fields of police and military are less likely to be appropriate for

women

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, I strongly hold that it should be equal to recruiting

women

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for these jobs. Admittedly,

women

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mostly have difficulties getting employed in the fields of police and military due to the factors of physical and mental health.

Firstly

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, regarding physical health, it is easier for

women

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to get exhausted when being on a mission. With that said, they could be more likely to accomplish the tasks under expectation.

Moreover

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, being under pressure or depression easily would seemingly be perceived as a major obstacle to

women

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in terms of mentality. Clearly, the prospect of losing control leading to unexpected outcomes of work would be considered inevitable.

Nevertheless

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women

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can

also

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apply for numerous vital segments in the police or military regardless of fighting.

To begin

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with, the

first

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field that

women

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appear to outperform in comparison to men is medicine-related. In

this

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regard, through the typical characteristic of behaving gently as well as flexible

maneuvers

Change the spelling

manoeuvres

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, it is shown that none is more suitable for nursing and aiding than

women

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In addition

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women

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are appropriate for taking the role in the financial field. It could be explained by the fact that

women

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have always played a prominent part in finance throughout history thanks to their caring manner.

Consequently

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, the reported statistics illustrate the precise allocation of the budget, at the same time ensuring long-term sustainability. In conclusion,

although

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women

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are surpassed by men regarding physical and mental health , I still believe that they would be needed for the goal of sustainable development.

Submitted by happyhihihehe on Fri Jul 15 2022

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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Some people believe that women should be treated as equal to men when applying for a job with the police or the military. Others think that women are less suitable for this kind of job. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Social interaction between people is destroyed by technology. Do you agree or disagree.

Young people are often influenced by their peers. This is called peer group pressure. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

The tourism industry has grown enormously over the last fifty years, and there are few places which are unaffected by it. However, tourism rarely benefits the countries which tourists visit. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.