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Band 5.5

Some people believe that companies should manufacture products that last for a long time. Others feel that the emphasis should be placed on producing goods that are cheap. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #companies #products #time #emphasis #goods
It is believed by some individuals that manufacturers should produce good
quality
products
 that are durable, whereas some
people
 prefer that
companies
 should focus on manufacturing goods that are inexpensive and affordable. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
companies
 should produce good
quality
products
 at low
prices
 so
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can be used by all the classes of our society. On one hand, some
people
 suggest that
companies
 should focus on producing
high
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
quality
products
 so that customers could use
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 for a longer time which will benefit the pockets of
Add an article
the consumer
show examples
consumer
Fix the agreement mistake
consumers
show examples
 as they don't need to spend money again and again to buy the same commodity.
Additionally
, superior
quality
products
 are low maintenance so
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
it
Add a verb
isit
wasit
show examples
 pocket friendly.
However
,
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the big brands who are manufacturing good
quality
products
 have created their monopoly in the market and they charge
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
 for their reliable
products
.
For example
, apple phones are super durable
water
Change preposition
with water
show examples
 resistance with good pixel and camera
quality
 but very expensive that it is not affordable
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
middle class
Add a hyphen
middle-class
show examples
people
.
On the contrary
, some folks consider that the focus should be on manufacturing goods at affordable
prices
 so that all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
classes of society should be able to purchase and make use of the
products
.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
 big percentage of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in the country is either middle class or poor class
people
 and buying costly
products
 is not at all feasible for them.
Therefore
, if brands could reduce the
price
 of
Add an article
the product
a product
show examples
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 it would become a boon for the
people
 living in poverty.
For example
,China
companies
 like Xiaomi,
Realme
Correct word choice
and Realme
show examples
manufactures
Correct subject-verb agreement
manufacture
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
Correct your spelling
smartphones
show examples
smart phones
Correct your spelling
smartphones
show examples
 at an extremely cheaper
price
 compared to
Correct your spelling
iPhone
iphone
Correct article usage
the iphone
show examples
 so that almost all
people
 can buy and use
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. In my opinion, if
companies
 will produce good
quality
products
 at
cheap
Add an article
a cheap
show examples
price
 it would increase the business as because of its affordable
price
 all the classes of our society would
be purchase
Change the verb form
purchase
show examples
 it resulting in
increase
Add an article
an increase
the increase
show examples
 of demand of the product which will eventually increase the sale and company's profit and revenue will reach heights. I believe
companies
 spend a huge amount on marketing and advertisements by reducing that it is feasible lower the
prices
 of commodities.
For example
, Reliance trends
also
 known as Ajio in India is selling
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
quality
 clothes at cheaper
prices
 which is attracting all the
people
 to buy from them.
Thus
, by reducing the
prices
 of
products
 profit margin will get reduced but at the same time sale will increase which will be a win-win situation for
Add an article
the consumer
show examples
consumer
Fix the agreement mistake
consumers
show examples
 as
he
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can buy
products
 at
affordable
Add an article
an affordable
show examples
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 and for the
companies
 because
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
products
Change noun form
products'
product's
show examples
 demand will be increased.
Submitted by priyankakriplani19 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • disposable goods
  • economic benefits
  • frequent replacements
  • technological adaptation
  • manufacturing affordability
  • environmental responsibility
  • longevity
  • minimize costs
  • wider society
What to do next:
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