Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development

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It is now trending for

people

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suffering from various health issues to try

home-made

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homemade

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medicines

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and therapies by themselves without consulting with their family

doctors

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. As far as I am concerned,

this

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the

Correct article usage

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negative trend and the reasons why

this

Linking Words

is a bad sign will be clarified in

this

Linking Words

essay. Seemingly, there are two vivid reasons why findings

alternative

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medicines

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and treatments by patients alone

has

Change the verb form

have

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negative

Add an article

a negative

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impact. The

first

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idea is that no one can possibly know more about pills than

doctors

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This

Linking Words

means that

doctors

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’ accumulated knowledge is inevitably greater and broader than normal

people

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due to their devotion to their

study

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studies

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for several years.

Therefore

Linking Words

for instance

Linking Words

, if

patient

Add an article

a patient

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suffering from

certain

Correct article usage

a certain

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illness takes

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines

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which can be dangerous without letting know his usual doctor,

then

Linking Words

Add the comma(s)

,in

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the long run, his health will surely break down because of the side effects from

such

Linking Words

treatments that he made with his limited knowledge. Another striking fact is that there will be

huge

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a huge

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misunderstanding

Fix the agreement mistake

misunderstandings

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between

doctors

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and patients if

this

Linking Words

situation grows bigger and bigger.

In other words

Linking Words

people

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would look up to themselves while underestimating

doctors

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’ skills if their

alternative

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methods went well luckily once.

As a result

Linking Words

, they will stop visiting their respective

doctors

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and

this

Linking Words

sacred job will become a dead profession eventually. In conclusion, I would argue that there is not a single possible effect that will benefit

people

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by trying

alternative

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medicines

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. While one of the noble professions (Doctor) can be vanished due to

this

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manner,

people

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’s lives can be lost in the worst case.

Hence

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, we need to have faith in

doctors

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so that nothing undesired will happen in the future.

Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on Sat Jul 16 2022

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

alternative medicines
treatments
positive development
negative development
health problems
usual doctor
access
personalized approach
holistic well-being
lack of regulation
evidence-based research
proper medical treatment

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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The only way to solve increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills. To what extent do you agree?

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Technology has made children less creative than they were in the past. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

People should only buy food sourced locally. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

In many countries, the government prioritises economic growth above all other concerns. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.