IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say that self employment is better than a job in a company or an institution. Discuss both modes of work and give your own opinion.

Many people are of the view that working for yourself is better than another entity,
while
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 some individuals have the opposite thought. I strongly agree that self-employment is better, as it provides
one
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 with total autonomy and job satisfaction. Working for a company or institution does have its advantages. Employees usually enjoy financial stability through a fixed salary,
along with
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 benefits
such
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 as health insurance and retirement plans.
Furthermore
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, working in an organisation often provides professional growth opportunities, since employees can learn from experienced colleagues and advance through promotions. For many,
this
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 sense of security and career progression is very valuable.In Pakistan, renowned companies provide their
employeers
Correct your spelling
employees
 with
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
 like health insurance, employee discounts, and retirement plans
On the other hand
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, being your own boss allows you to be flexible with your schedule. Since you have control over everything, you can work at your own pace and time.
This
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 approach allows
one
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 to avoid burnout
while
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also
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 having time to do extracurricular work or interact with your family. A lot of jobs in Pakistan require workers to follow highly demanding shifts, which can mentally drain the person;
thus
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, they do not have the energy to interact with other people.
Besides
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this
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, working for yourself can give
one
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 immense job satisfaction. When someone is self-employed, they are most likely to pursue the things they enjoy doing.
Although
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this
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 trend may not yield quick results, being content with yourself enables
one
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 to look past these problems.
In addition
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, you directly reap the benefits of your hard work,
further
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 increasing your satisfaction. A survey was taken of 200 people in Pakistan to determine whether they were satisfied with their jobs. Despite having high-paying jobs, the majority of the residents answered that they were not satisfied.
This
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 can cause
one
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's mental health to take a toll,
due to
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 which cases of depression increase. In conclusion,
while
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 traditional
employement
Correct your spelling
employment
 offers financial stability and career development, I believe that freelancing is more beneficial in the long run. Its flexibility and personal fulfilment
allows
Correct subject-verb agreement
allow
show examples
one
Use synonyms
 to maintain a balanced life and avoid burnout.

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language
Check spelling and grammar; fix common errors like 'employeers' and 'benifits'.
coherence
Make each idea clear and linked; use simple connect words to show flow.
task
Give direct and clear examples for each point; avoid long talk without proof.
content
The writer shows a clear view and strong stance.
structure
The essay talks about both sides and gives reasons.
content
Some use of real country facts shows awareness of the topic.
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