It is important for people to take risks, both in their personal lives and professional lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages

#people #risks #lives #risk

It is undeniable that taking

risk

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risks

show examples

has significant

impacts

Fix the agreement mistake

impact

show examples

Correct your spelling

individual's

individula’s

Correct your spelling

individuals’s

personal and career lives . I go along with

this

view that creat

risks

will be positive on the whole and will have

potential

Add an article

the potential

show examples

for growth and

dvancement

Correct your spelling

advancement

. Critics of

this

trend suggest that people without

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accepting

acepting

Correct your spelling

accepting

risks

do not have

any

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show examples

opportunity to make

progress

in their careers.

This

argument rests on the fact that the rate of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

productivity and creativity are

decreaing

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decreasing

in some

well known

Add a hyphen

well-known

show examples

compoines

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companies

due to the fact that

emlpoyees

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employees

are content with their position in society. As well as , Most of the young generations have faced problems in their personal relationship.they do not have a tendency to recognize people and establish

Add an article

a relationship

show examples

relationship

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relationships

show examples

with peers because of

lack

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a lack

show examples

accpeting

Correct your spelling

accepting

risks

.The result of

this

is that

vast

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the vast

show examples

majority of adults are faced with psychological

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problems

probles

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problems

such

deprresion

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depression

anxiety

Correct word choice

and anxiety

show examples

. Proponents of taking

risks

on the other hand

, argue the

tengible

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tangible

ramifications concerning

make

Wrong verb form

making

show examples

progress

in your position works . Ambitious people are more likely to become successful in their

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

by chasing their dreams in fields which have lots of challenging and

risks

. They understand that

take

Wrong verb form

taking

show examples

risks

not only

give

Correct subject-verb agreement

gives

show examples

them

opportunity

Add an article

the opportunity

an opportunity

show examples

saisfy

Correct your spelling

satisfy

their

nedd

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need

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

is the way for making

progress

to have promotion

Correct your spelling

show examples

ate

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show examples

work.

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Furthermore

Furthemore

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Furthermore

, some advanced countries

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believe

show examples

belive

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believe

show examples

that one of the crucial responsibilities of government is that

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prepare

prepar

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prepare

infrastructures for teenagers and

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teach

show examples

tech

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teach

show examples

them how to establish and develop

Correct your spelling

relationships

relationship

realtionship

Correct your spelling

relationships

with their genders , because of that most of them do not

any

Add a missing verb

have any

show examples

bstcales

Correct your spelling

obstacles

in their future In Conclusion , taking

risks

will have been direct

impacts

Fix the agreement mistake

impact

show examples

on people’s growth and

progress

in order to personal or official lives. I appreciate

this

point of view that one of the

pragmatice

Correct your spelling

pragmatic

pragmatics

cause

Fix the agreement mistake

causes

show examples

risks

is improving your

characters

Fix the agreement mistake

character

show examples

Submitted by soulmaz.sh71 on Mon Jul 18 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
50Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

310 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their personal lives and professional lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Online games are becoming more and more popular these days. What are the advantages and disadvantages of online games?

At present time, the population of some countries include a relatively large number of young adults compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the drawbacks?

Write a letter to a friend who will come to your country to work for 6 months. In your letter, you should: •recommend a city •suggest a few jobs that your friend could do •give some opinions about making friends with the locals.

Some pp prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, that change is aways a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.