IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflects the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree of disagree?

#sales #consumer #goods #power #society
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In our consumerist society, we have been bombarded continuously with a multitude of advertisements.
Although
Linking Words
 some people believe that it urges
buyers
Use synonyms
 into buying popular goods for no good reasons apparently, others argue that it is a form of communication adopted by organisations. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument, while I support the latter opinion. On the
first
Linking Words
 hand, many people argue that commercials for best-selling
products
Use synonyms
 lure consumers into buying them without having any requirements. The reason for
this
Linking Words
 is that
buyers
Use synonyms
 usually fall into the trap of attractive discounts and schemes, contrived into making a purchase. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
 point, mobile companies in India lure both new and existing customers into buying their new gadgets or offerings by offering lucrative exchange offers.
In contrast
Linking Words
, if these organisations stopped advertising unnecessarily, sales of these organisations would be affected rather negatively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, I would argue that an advertisement is a form of communication rather than enticing
buyers
Use synonyms
 into buying
products
Use synonyms
 for no reason.
This
Linking Words
 is because of the fact that it creates awareness for
products
Use synonyms
 offered by companies before potential
buyers
Use synonyms
. To amplify, we are exposed to advertisements from various brands on multiple platforms because of brand recognition.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, if there were no advertisements from brands, we would never be able to compare
products
Use synonyms
 before buying them.
As a result
Linking Words
 of
this
Linking Words
, we will never be able to buy a sound product. In conclusion, while advertisement compels people into buying goods and services, which they do not require, it is a form of communication to create awareness for
products
Use synonyms
, enabling
buyers
Use synonyms
 to buy them when a need arises.
Submitted by utsavchandel26sep on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumer behavior
  • perceived need
  • lifestyle aspirations
  • brand image
  • prestige
  • psychological techniques
  • scarcity
  • social proof
  • celebrity endorsements
  • technological advancements
  • product innovations
  • emerging consumer needs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: