Film stars and music celebrities may earn a great deal of money and live in luxurious surroundings, but many of them lead unhappy lives. Do you agree? To what extent is this the price they pay for being famous?

#film #stars #music #celebrities #money #surroundings #lives #price

Film stars and music

celebrities

may earn a great deal of

money

and live in luxurious surroundings, indeed.

However

, many of them would experience unhappy lives, and I agree with

this

opinion. There are several reasons why famous and rich

people

would still have a chance to live unpleasant lives.

First

money

does not always bring happiness. In fact, we can gain joyful moments through simple things which are the things that we will not have even through

money

such

as having quality time with our beloved ones, having good health, eating some delicious meals, and so on.

On the other hand

, some film stars and

celebrities

seem to have less privacy as they are well-known in public. Since

people

are likely to have eyes on them, they would find it difficult to enjoy their

life

For instance

, when some

celebrities

want to go on holiday with their family to a certain place,

people

in those areas tend to follow them whenever and wherever they are or might bother them by taking pictures of their private

life

secretly. When it happens, it would lead those

celebrities

to have uncomfortable times.

Furthermore

, they might feel depressed and frustrated. To sum up, even

thoughthey

Correct your spelling

though they

have lots of

money

and live in luxurious surroundings, we can still feel

displeasing

Wrong verb form

displeased

show examples

life

because it is still hard to become public

figures

Fix the agreement mistake

figure

show examples

In addition

, they are still human beings or ordinary

people

just like us, and perhaps some of them are living

complicated

Add an article

a complicated

show examples

life

Submitted by melindahthrsyaa on Fri Jul 22 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

249 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Film stars and music celebrities may earn a great deal of money and live in luxurious surroundings, but many of them lead unhappy lives. Do you agree? To what extent is this the price they pay for being famous?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific world, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Employers should give their staff at least a 4-week holiday a year to help employees perform better in their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the government should spend more money in putting in more works of art like painting and statutes in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

task 2: Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcycles are banned from the city center. People are encouraged to use public transportation such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free days. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?