Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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These days, a smartphone is one of the most crucial factors in part of people's lives, especially the new generation. The first thing that
children
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do when they
woke
Correct your spelling
wake
show examples
up is to check their
self-phones
Correct your spelling
phones
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to update data
while
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they
were
Wrong verb form
are
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sleeping. In my opinion, the disadvantages of
this
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behaviour outweigh its benefits and the reasons to support
this
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argument will give in
this
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essay. Nowadays, most people
are owner
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own
show examples
mobile phones even
children
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because, in a Covid-19 situation, they need to use them for online study. They,
however
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, didn't spend the most time in the education field, they usually spend most of their free time in the entertainment field
such
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as playing games. It is very easy to play games wherever and whenever they want.
For example
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, when my nephew
visited
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visits
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me at my house, he always plays games on his mobile phone. He seems not
interesting
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interested
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when I ask him to do other activities else. Regards
this
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behaviour of my nephew, I think
this
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is a negative development because it affects both his physical and mental
health
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of
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apply
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him
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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. The former is obvious which is his weight increasing very fast because of fewer activities to move his body. It causes his mental
health
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that is
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lower in patience than usual, he cannot wait for something and is frustrated.
Hence
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, if
children
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spend a lot of time on smartphones, they will absolutely get
worst
Correct word choice
worse
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on
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in
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their
health
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. In conclusion,
children
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spending hours on
self-phone
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their phones
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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the worst choice for me because the
health
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problems both physical and mental will affect them in the future.
Submitted by PM on

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coherence and cohesion
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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