IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest? Write at least 250 words

#internet #information
In
this
 modern era of technology, it is impossible to imagine a life without any access to the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 as many individuals across the globe depend on the
internet
 to carry out their daily course of activities.
However
, excessive dependency on
this
 type of advancement can be detrimental in many ways. In
this
 essay, I will highlight the serious issues it can cause and solutions
further
Rephrase
apply
show examples
to tackle the situation.
To begin
 with, the main issue
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 has brought
along with
 it, is data
breaching
Replace the word
breach
show examples
. Data breaching mainly involves getting access to users' personal information and misusing or selling
this
 user data to companies in order to boost their revenues . As per the Google survey, in the
last
 5 years, the number of hackers has quadrupled.
For instance
, nowadays people are using
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 banking to avoid standing in a long queue in banks to withdraw/ deposit cash or any
kind
 of activity related to their bank account.
However
, the account details which are saved on one’s computer can be stolen and
further
 misused. To overcome
this
 problem,
firstly
, in my opinion, government authorities should pass some
kind
 of strict law to restrict
such
kind
 of misuse of the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.
However
, it's not only the Government’s responsibility to work in
this
kind
 of situation.
Hence
, I presume the people who are actively using the
internet
 should try to acquire adequate knowledge regarding its boons
as well as
 curses to avoid being stuck in big blunders
due to
 lack of awareness.
To conclude
, in a nutshell, though the
Internet
 makes our life a bit easier as well fast paced, overuse or misuse of the same will have a hazardous effect. To avoid
this
, not only the government but
also
 individuals should actively participate in spreading awareness.
Submitted by sansare.tejasvi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Enhance your understanding of the task requirements to provide a more comprehensive response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical development of ideas throughout the essay to improve coherence and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cybersecurity
  • phishing
  • identity theft
  • misinformation
  • fake news
  • social isolation
  • internet addiction
  • data privacy
  • digital literacy
  • regulations
  • awareness programs
  • manipulate
  • proliferation
  • consent
  • escalated
What to do next:
Look at other essays: